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Party in London's biggest new club, go wine tasting with some friends, settle in for a night of stand-up comedy or listen to some acid jazz... There are plenty of things to do in London if you're single or if you want to put two fingers up at Cupid. And with Valentine's Day falling on a Sunday, there are much better things to be doing over the weekend than forking out for a three-course meal and a dozen red roses.
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Seven Sins of Soho: Anti-Valentine Party
Kingly Club, W1B 5PW13th February 2010
The Kingly Club launches its Seven Sins of Soho night with an anti-Valentine's party on Saturday 13 February. Fittingly for such a night, the inaugural theme for the first of this series of bi-monthly events will be Lust: that is, none of your nansy pansy chocolates and flowers - just 100 per cent bestial instinct and carnal attraction. Erotic burlesque will be performed by Valeria Dragova, who will encapsulate Lust with a show reminiscent of pre-war Berling cabaret with a smoky ambiance of corrupt sexual depravity, while music will come from special guest, Housexy's Jake Duval, a Ministry of Sound resident. A lingerie brand has been brought in to support the event, but there's no confirmation as yet if all the bargirls will be flaunting this kinky weaponry as they serve a selection of sinful cocktails named after each of the deadly sins (Lust's offering is rather prosaically tagged 'John Meets Christine' and is a blend of gin, champagne, passion fruit and pear puree).
Kinky Malinki @ Matter: Wally Lopez
Matter at the O2 Arena, London, SE10 0DY13th February 2010
Ibiza favourite Wally Lopez is the special guest for Kinky Malinki's Valentine's party at Matter on Saturday 13th February. Spanish DJ Lopez, who with his trademark wrap-around glasses is a dead ringer for the goofy character in the Where's Wally books, is one of house music's rising international stars, and should provide the perfect tonic for young party goers whose idea of a good night is not a romantic 6pm tete-a-tete in the local Chez Gerard (because everywhere else was booked out). So, forget Cupid and get your dancing shoes down to the O2 Arena for this one. Sidney Samson, Juan Kidd, Kid Massive, Baggi Begovic, Steve Boyd, Groove Project and Grant Nalder also play house and electro through the two rooms.
Men's Afternoon Tea at the Mandeville
Mandeville Place, W1U 2BEMonday-Saturday
Sophisticated, single man-about-town? Or simply frustrated when your girlfriend insists on more sale shopping in Selfridges? This could prove the perfect tonic. Don your chinos and tweed and drop into the effortlessly chic Mandeville Hotel in haughty Marylebone for the capital's only afternoon tea for men. Think of it as the culinary and social equivalent of a Yorkie bar for the discerning male customer. Offering a range of whiskies as well as champagne, tea with the boys is accompanied by a selection of grown-up games available at the bar. Eschew female favourites such as Connect 4 and Guess Who? - unwind over a round of backgammon, cards or chess. Add to that a feast of roast sirloin sandwiches, chicken satays and potted shrimps followed by hearty chocolate brownies and scones, washed down with a selection of Earl Gray and Darjeeling's as well as a variety of the finest bourbons. All this served in the stunning deVille restaurant on fabulous Tiffany blue china from £22.50. With Valentine's Day on the horizon for Sunday, this could provide the perfect calm before the storm...
Comedy Roast UK: Richard Blackwood
Shepherd's Bush Empire, London, W12 8TT14th February 2010
Why not treat a loved one to a romantic roast on Valentine's Day? Spectators in their droves look set to flock to the Shepherd's Bush Empire to watch comedian Richard Blackwood get "roasted" by six fellow professionals. But where "comedy roast" may well mean something totally different for a group of footballers on a night out on, say, 1st April, in the show-business world of stand-up it's a whole new probing activity. Roasting someone is very much like toasting them, except instead of raising a glass, you're expected to mix comedic insults with praise, tributes and outlandish stories both true and totally fabricated. The "roastee" - in this case comedy stalwart Mr Blackwood - accepts the ribbing in good light and performs to the crowd too, safe in the knowledge that it's a great honour (as opposed to a footballing degradation) to be roasted. The whole concept comes from over the Atlantic and makes its UK debut with this star-studded show, which features fellow black comics Slim, Kat, Miss London, Mr Cee (The Roast Master) and Harvey. For more information go to www.comedyroastuk.com.
Oh My God! I Miss You Present A Valentine's Flight Of Fancy: Dumb Love
Bethnal Green Working Men's Club, London, E2 6NB13th February 2010
'Dumb Love' strikes again at Bethnal Green Working Men's Club with the return of Oh My God! I Miss You's Valentine's party featuring more puppy love shenanigans this February. The theme for this year's "vile lovefest" is Swoonsome Twosome, Filthy Threesome or Legendary Union - so take your pick from the likes of Jordan & Peter, Bonnie & Clyde, Henry VII & his wives or, er, Tiger Woods & his string of hussies (is the venue big enough?!). Special entertainment comes from Barbie & Ken performing live, all male dance troup The Action Men, a special love & hate message board, a range of cabaret acts and a whole cluster of Valentine's surprises and prizes. Resident DJs will be rolling out the love ballads, love-sick songs, kitsch classics and rock 'n' roll novelty songs till 2am and it's a cheap date with tickets a snip at £8.
St Valentine's Day Ball
Battersea Arts Centre (BAC), London, SW11 5TN14th February 2010
The St Valentine's Day Ball at Battersea Arts Centre promises an evening of variety for old and new romantics alike, brought to you from honky-tonk promoters Duckie. Entertainment incluses OAP hip hop star Ida Barr, octogenarian dance troupe The Company of Elders, Australian pop rockers 1927, harmonium maestro Matthew Robins and comic visionary superstar Miss High Leg Kick, plus many more. Hostess for the night is the comedienne Miss Amy Lame while DJs Mr Wonderful and Father Cloth will crank up the record player with some mellifluous melodies and (for the oldies) some back-breaking beats. This is a swanky ball so make an effort and put on your Sunday best - but don't worry about bringing a partner for this is far from a couples-only event. Arrive early to sample the delights of the free buffet.
Valentine's at Vinopolis
Vinopolis, London, SE1 9BU11th February 2010 - 14th February 2010
Brush up your knowledge of wine this Valentine's at a series of tasting events at Vinopolis. There's something for everyone, whether you're single, married, a lover of fine wine or Champagne or simply in need of a laugh. First up, explore the history and taste the cuvees of Nicolas Feuillatte, France's number one Champagne brand, in a bubbling Champagne Masterclass led by cellar master Jean-Pierre Vincent (11th Feb at 6.30pm - £40 per person). The Friday evening before Valentine's is devoted to a couple of Singles Tours - think speed dating but over a selection of fine wines - as groups of guys and girls take part in interactive wine challenges and cocktail tastings (starting at 7.30pm and 8pm - £30). The Laughter Lounge drops into Vinopolis on Saturday 13th February with a live comedy show featuring stand-ups Markus Birdman, Michael Legge and Quincy (8pm - £12 adv, £15 on the door). Then Valentine's Day proper features a series of self-guided Wine Tours (starting every half hour from 12noon-3.30pm - £25) for loved-up couples (or singletons downing their sorrows). With a variety of sparkling wine tastings, regular and premium wine tastings, cocktails, tapas and live Flamenco dancing on the cards, this is a fun and original way to spend a couple of hours on a day that can all too easily get bogged down in cliche. But if it's a romantic meal for two that you're after, then bring your loved one along to an indulgent Gourmet Food and Wine Masterclass with a delicious Valentine's inspired four course menu paired with a fabulous selection of wines (1pm - £50). See www.vinopolis.co.uk for more details. Cheers!
Down with Dating & Feeling Gloomy
O2 Academy Islington, London, N1 0PS19th February 2010
Stuff Valentine's Day and head to the O2 Academy Islington to take part in the ultimate anti-dating night. Down With Dating precedes Feeling Gloomy's Tainted Love night and is ideal for all those heartsick homies who are fed up with dating events treating them like a pint glass of chopped liver. The alternative night's entertainment includes the world famous Speed Hating ("The hottest dating craze" according to MSN, no less) and a spot of Blind Hate (no doubt with presenter Kila Slack). Down With Dating's part of the show runs from 8pm-10pm and includes free entry to the Feeling Gloomy after party where, who knows, you may even meet the guy/girl of your dreams.
Disney Classics on Valentine's Day
Barbican Centre, EC2Y 8DS13th February 2010 - 14th February 2010
The Barbican Centre is offering an alternative to traditional Valentine's celebrations with a day of Disney Classics being shown on the big screen. Thankfully, they have resisted the temptation of showing Lady and the Tramp (with its romantic spaghetti-eating scene) and have gone for newly released fairytale The Princess and the Frog (12.30pm and 7pm), the technically perfect and beautifully rendered fable Pinocchio (3pm), and the landmark musical animation Fantasia (7pm). On Saturday there is also a 3pm screening of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, one of the most enchanting films of all time. Check www.barbican.org.uk for times and ticket information.
Tim Key: The Slutcracker
Soho Theatre, W1D 3NE9th February 2010 - 20th February 2010
Edinburgh Comedy Award 2009 winner Tim Key brings his offbeat poetry show The Slutcracker for a two-week residency at the Soho Theatre. You may remember Key from Charlie Brooker's Screenwipe and Newswipe programmes, in which the well-dressed 33-year-old deadpanned succinct verses about greedy financiers ("The banker had swan and caviar around his chops"), Gordon Brown's glass eye and Deal or No Deal. A glimpse at Key on Twitter will show you what he's all about: "Some girls. Were having a chat. A pervert. Stared at them. / Last night Matt got in a punch up. It all started when he thumped a Chinese girl. / Oscar had an affair with Ray's wife (Mae). They were ever so careful about it. They only saw each other twice in 15 years." But of course, that's only half of it, for the joy of the idiosyncratic and often banal poetry really comes in its eccentric, slow delivery, which has you in stitches and on the edge of your seat in equal measures. Key is a star in the making, with films, books and a TV series already gracing his CV - which contains a stint on the Cambridge Floodlights Tour in 2001 (after he successfully pretended to be a student). The Slutcracker is "an indefinably crackers hour" (The Independent) with "beauty that peeps through the silliness" (The Guardian).
Ronny Jordan Trio
Jazz Cafe, London, NW1 7PG13th February 2010 - 14th February 2010
One of acid jazz's most prominent guitarists, Ronny Jordan, brings his trio into the Jazz Cafe for back-to-back gigs this Valentine's weekend. Definitely not one for the jazz purists, the London-born Jordan has strong influences in Hip Hop and started his career fusing rap and jazz together on the top of his lightening-fingered self-taught guitar skills. His maiden single After Hours would be a precursor to the acid jazz movement and soon Jordan was covering the likes of Miles Davis, starring on Guru's tour de force Jazzmatazz and having industry figures swoon at his feet. Jordan's latest record, The Rough and the Smooth, is just out and so expect some new material being played on both nights at the Camden venue. And as a Valentine's special surprise, Jordan will be giving out free CDs to everyone on the night.
Bavarian Beerhouse Carnival Party
Bavarian Beerhouse, EC1V 2QH13th February 2010
London's only authentic German pub and restaurant welcomes you to celebrate the world famous Cologne Carnival with an evening of fancy dress, entertainment and - no doubt - much beer drinking. Every year more than a million people flock to the German town of Cologne to make merry and feast ahead of Ash Wednesday and the beginning of Lent. Old Street's Bavarian Beerhouse will be recreating the street party vibe with guests encouraged to dress as outrageously as possible for a night of Teutonic decadence. As fancy dress is a large part of the Cologne Carnival (every year, three men pay vast sums of money for the honour of being the official Prince, Farmer or Virgin) guests are advised to rummage through their wardrobes so they can pull of a convincing Prinz, Bauer or Jungfrau. Failing that, we're sure a tight pair of traditional lederhosen won't go amiss - and you'll look the bees-knees as the DJ starts dropping some Oompah classics on the dance floor.
A London Valentine 2010
Perfect Presents
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Dining Out
A romantic tete-a-tete can be the simplest, but most effective, way of celebrating Valentine's Day and London is brimming with del...
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Petal Power
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Food of Love
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Hot Dates
Luckily London has no end of choice for romantic places you can take a date on or around 14th February. Seek out special...
Hot Dates
London for Lovers
There's an infinite array of romantic activities to do in the capital a deux - and many of them are free. Take a ro...
London for Lovers
Romantic Hotels
With Valentine's falling on a Sunday this year, it's the ideal time to make a weekend of it. Book a couple of nights away at ...
Romantic Hotels
London Hotels
From cheap budget hotels to luxury 5 star suites see our discounts for hotels, including Grange City Hotel London from 60% off. |
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