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July
Are We Reaching Boiling Point Yet This Summer? 24th July 2007
We wouldn't want to make a splash...
I hate that bit in ‘Four Weddings and a Funeral’ when Carrie (Andie MacDowell) is hearing how Charles (Hugh Grant) is head over heels in love with her and it’s absolutely lashing down with rain and she says ‘Is it raining..? I hadn’t noticed”. Pur-leease! I know love is blind and all that but this is too much – there are streams of water coursing down her cheeks, her hair is plastered to her head and she’d look like a drowned rat if it wasn’t for the really rather good L’Oreal makeup. I guess declaring your undying love in a torrential downpour is meant to be utterly romantic but I digress – I was reminded of this scene in reference to our good ol’ British summer. If London could utter a collective sound bite on the weather, I’m sure it would be “Is it raining..? I hadn’t noticed”.

I remember mumbling mild surprise when the rain got truly apocalyptic outside my window at work and, even by British standards, there have been more conversations that usual about the weather but I think it’s our stiff upper lips that really prevent us from being too downhearted. I can almost hear the cries of “just a bit of rain” from households across the country. When things got even worse and the Thames burst its banks, this elicited strangely knowing nods from Londoners along with a few headshakes over the Metro on the Tube. Press photographs show people staunchly carrying their heaving suitcases while wading through knee-high water – what else can they do but one gets the impression that when they reach dry land someone will just whack the kettle on for a pot of tea, that sure-fire remedy to any crisis in England!

Even when our British reserve fails us and we do concede that things are pretty bad, soon another side takes over- resignation. I think this is because we don’t expect anything more from our emerald green isle than flooding in July. When it happens we are almost pleased to have been proved right – “it always rains during Wimbledon”, “well, this is England” and “I knew having a picnic wasn’t a good idea”.

Admittedly prices are soaring with a last minute dash to the sun but imagine the scene. On a ski trip a few years back – one of those package deals, all-inclusive right down to the vinegary wine (before I discovered luxury chalets) - a Mr Brittas-type and his wife (think Hyacinth Bucket) turned up in Val Thorens with bags full of beach towels, Bermuda shorts and John Grisham novels to read by the pool. They thought they’d booked a summer holiday. Their realisation and utter horror just kept on growing as they were taken higher and higher into the snow-capped mountains of the French Alps. Number one, who on earth thinks Val Thorens is in Spain? And two, imagine their crushing disappointment at thinking they were going to a resort near Benalmadena and ending up with a cup of vin chaud by a log fire…

I tell this story because it goes someway to illustrate what happens to us every time we go on holiday in England expecting the sun to shine, except unlike Mr Brittas and Hyacinth we do it knowingly. We know it’s going to rain, we know we’re going to regret packing vest tops instead of fleeces and we know it’s going to take us 24 hours to get to Cornwall in the floods (this actually happened) but us Brits will carry on regardless. Don’t let anyone tell us we can’t have our camping holiday even if it does mean getting washed away with our tent in a river of mud. We will have fun, we will endure the weather and we certainly won’t give up and check in to a B&B. We’re not going to let “a little bit of rain” spoil our long weekend to the Lake District, trip to the seaside or much-loved holiday under canvas in Somerset, which, incidentally, is where I’m going next week…
Countdown to Christmas!
The weather of late may make it feel like it’s the middle of winter but August is too soon for Christmas shopping even by Santa’s standards. This hasn’t stopped Selfridges from ushering in the festive spirit and throwing open the doors of its Christmas shop for those who want to get a (four-month) head start. Shockingly, the store has chosen opulence (or expense) as this year’s theme…

The Streets are Paved with Gold
The treasure hunt for a fake bar of gold is over with Australian Michael Barry in possession of the £1,000 piece of art. Artist Paul Insect created 99 gold-plated brass bars for an exhibition at the Lazarides Gallery in Soho and hid one more somewhere in the city with clues to uncover the bounty on his website. All very ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’ except X didn’t mark the spot and Mr Barry probably used an A to Z to find Cambridge Heath Road in Bethnal Green.
Harry works his Magic
There really has been too much excitement for one week for Potter fans – queuing up at midnight to get the final book and heading to see Harry’s adventures in his fifth year at Hogwarts played out on the big screen. If latest box office figures are anything to go by the film is not doing too badly. With a record opening of £16.4 million (and still rising) it looks set to be an all-time hit for British films – with a little financial help from the Americans…
2009
2004
30th December
Party Pooper
23rd December
The Second Battle of Trafalgar
16th December
Sadie's Year
28th November
Ripper-Watch
21st November
Kinky Boots
14th November
Smoked out
22nd October
Yuppie Meal
15th October
Fines of Fury
8th October
No Twist in the Turner
17th September
Battleships, bloodsports and Batman
10th September
Clique Week
3rd September
Return of the Bard
20th August
Politics Takes Centre Stage
13th August
Crisis in Theatreland
6th August
Journey's End
23rd July
Healing Waters
16th July
Mandela Statue in Doubt
9th July
From Art to Ashes
2nd July
One Hurdle Nearer to Gold
 
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