Free Fares For the Fat and the Fashionable

An influx of under-18s on the buses may not be to everyone's advantage

Now, it’s not so long since I was a teenager that I’ve forgotten the pleasures and terrors of travelling by bus at that age. The joy of lounging with your cool friends at the back, gossiping with the girls, flirting with the boys, and making it clear to the grown-ups that you were younger, more attractive and way more fun. Or the terrible fear when you realised that getting to a seat meant going past those tough girls from the school down the road, and then apparently forgetting how to walk, stumbling your way past, and being jeered all the way to your seat. Bus travel is an essential, thrilling part of teenage life in the big city.

But Mayor Ken’s plan to make bus travel free for all under-18s strikes me as very dangerous indeed. I don’t mean to come across all Mary Whitehouse on you, but the last thing we need is for children and teenagers to become more mobile.

The average pre-teen appears to have their finger on the pulse of fashion in a way that I never achieved at any stage in my life. Discreet designer labels, vintage classics, witty riffs on the tropes of MTV fashion, asymmetrical this, customised that... It’s terribly depressing for a girl with a substantial income and an interest in looking good to find herself taking style tips from people less than half her age.

And when these kids can hop on any old bus without paying a penny, imagine the vista that will open up beyond their local high streets: Mayfair, Floral Street, Seven Dials, Portobello Road. By the time they hit fourteen, they’ll be lounging around with the gorgeous metrosexual staff in every boutique, laughing at us oldies and our pathetic clothes.

Our only hope is that free transport will finally make them give up on using their feet to get anywhere: when the child obesity epidemic kicks in, it should do so with a vengeance and there’s only so much that clothes can do for you if you’ve spent all that bus money on Mars Bars and Smirnoff Ice.

This autumn’s colour is red, and horizontal stripes are still going strong. I’d like to see a three hundred pound twelve-year-old look good in that outfit.

Freesheet Flurry

A new free London newspaper is now circulating in the capital and a further rival freesheet is due to begin circulation next week. Media giant Associated Newspapers has launched its free paper London Lite, signalling the start of its freesheet battle with rival News International. Their new title will be called Thelondonpaper and like London Lite will have a print run of about 400,000 copies. The two new afternoon newspapers will be targeted at younger commuters who get much of their news from websites and do not expect to pay for a newspaper. It will bring the total of London’s freesheets to four – the Metro and City AM are already distributed in the morning.

Flame Academy

The Royal Academy of Art came under threat when a next door building caught fire. Despite the effort of over 60 firefighters, the roof of one of the prestigious establishment's buildings was severely damaged. A fire brigade spokesman said 30% of the roof had been completely destroyed by the fire, but thankfully no artworks were damaged in the blaze. The Saatchi gallery had been preparing a major exhibition on American Art in the damaged building due to open on 6 October. The date will now be postponed. Following the Momart Warehouse fire in 2004, it seems Saatchi has yet again been affected by fire.

Soca Shocker!

More than 800,000 people partied in the streets of West London during the 42nd Notting Carnival on Bank Holiday Weekend. 50,000 carnival performers and 84 floats transformed the local neighbourhood into a colourful Caribbean spectacle. A happy mix of traditional steelband Soca music and hip hop beats rang out from over 41 static sound systems along the three-mile parade route. This year in the wake of London’s successful 2012 Olympic bid, the carnival theme was “unity”.

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