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LondonTown.com | Nelson's Column
 

C-Charge Protest Fails to Bring Down Government

16th February 2007

 

But who are these people who claim to use their cars in Central London?

Ha! Ha! Ha! Do you know how many people turned up for the demonstration against the C-Charge Zone Expansion, after literally tens of thousands of words of anguished editorial in the right-wing press? One hundred and fifty. That’s two-hundred-and-fifty less than turned up for a pillow fight in Trafalgar square last Christmas, a hundred less than have signed up for a Petition on the Number 10 website to ‘improve letter boxes’ (no more details given. Your guess is as good as mine), and only a couple more than came to the dreadful, dreadful New Year’s Eve party I was obliged to attend this year.

Driving anywhere in London is like walking in the countryside: it might seem like a good idea, but it always takes at least nine times as long as you’d expect, and leaves you crippled with fury at dead ends, aggressive locals and incomprehensible maps. If Londoners are in a hurry, they get the tube. If we want to enjoy a journey, we hop on a double-decker bus – very nippy in these post C-Charge days - or into a black cab. But we all know better than to drive.

Which begs the question of who these hundred-and-fifty protestors were. Some four or five, I have no doubt, are people whose livelihood is genuinely threatened by the new zone. Several more, I would guess, were journalists from the area, hoping for a scoop, and incidentally furious that they were going to have to pay if they wanted to drive to the organic butcher’s at 12:15, when everyone else in the country was at work.

But I suspect that most of them were people who live just beyond the fringes of K & C, but have always claimed their homes were ‘just off King Street’, ‘oh, I’m a real Notting Hillbilly, mwah, mwah’ or ‘up the road from Chelsea harbour’, and are now furious that those big red ‘C’ symbols on the road prove that they live in dull Hammersmith, dirty Shepherd’s Bush or crack-happy Kensal Rise.

My apologies to anyone whose life has genuinely been spoiled by the C-Charge, but let the rest of you raise a cheer to Ken for adding a whole extra level to postcode-snobbery.

Tate Modern is Worse than Blackpool

With a 21% increase in visitor numbers since 2005, Tate Modern is now the second most visited venue in the country. 4.9m visitors during 2006 make the Bankside modern art gallery second only to the Blackpool Pleasure Beach with its annual scoop of 5.6 million.

Hampstead Heathens Stop the Music

Kenwood House’s popular summer concert series has been cancelled this year following complaints from local residents. Concerns over noise and traffic increase led to English Heritage’s decision to halt the event which usually attracts over 60,000 yearly visitors.

Last Orders for London's Boozers

London’s pub population is on the decrease with an average of five watering holes closing down each week. The capital lost 230 inns in 2006 – a 53% increase on the previous year – a trend which seems set to continue.

 
 
 
 

2009

29th December Predictions for 2010
30th November London 1 Paris 0
27th November Mr Benn, The Wombles
26th October Posties Strike a Chord
26th October Frieze Still Pleases
26th September A River Runs Through It
23rd September Blogging is Best
26th August When Saturday comes
22nd August Bring on the Bikes
27th July Against the Clock
20th July View for a thrill
18th June Let Them Eat Cake
16th June Only Fools And Horses?
26th May Come Rain Or Shine
18th May Embarrassing Expenses
27th April New Designs on Old Fossils
19th April City Slickers
26th March Woody Set for Rematch
10th March Take a Bow, London
18th February New Photography Laws
12th February Glitz and the Pitts
27th January Setting the Standard
21st January Too Much for Posh Nosh?
 
 
 
 
 

2004

30th December Party Pooper
23rd December The Second Battle of Trafalgar
16th December Sadie's Year
28th November Ripper-Watch
21st November Kinky Boots
14th November Smoked out
22nd October Yuppie Meal
15th October Fines of Fury
8th October No Twist in the Turner
17th September Battleships, bloodsports and Batman
10th September Clique Week
3rd September Return of the Bard
20th August Politics Takes Centre Stage
13th August Crisis in Theatreland
6th August Journey's End
23rd July Healing Waters
16th July Mandela Statue in Doubt
9th July From Art to Ashes
2nd July One Hurdle Nearer to Gold