Budgy Smuggling

Just why a group of men ran through London in speedos

Anyone out browsing Portobello Market on the morning of Saturday 15th May would have been rather taken aback to see a group of grown men running in a pack wearing nothing but bright speedos. It was a flash mob event – almost quite literally – which put a smile on the faces of people all the way to Wandsworth, including the new Chancellor of the Exchequer.

Nelson's Column caught up with one of the 'Budgy Smugglers' for a quick chat about why anyone in the right mind would do such a thing.

NC: So, why the skimpy swimwear?
BS: Ha! The guy who organised the run, a friend of mine from school, has a little side project importing the trunks from Australia. They're called – for obvious reasons – Budgy Smugglers. All the runners had to buy a pair from him and donate a tenner to Help The Heroes.

NC: Were you not worried about running near-naked around town?
BS: Petrified! But luckily enough it was a warm and sunny morning – so we didn't have to worry about things appearing a little smaller... Once we all met up it became clear that it would be ok – strength in numbers and all that. The concern was that you'd have to stop to tie up a shoelace and then be forced to play catch up alone.

NC: What was the route?
BS: Our plan was to get from Westbourne Park to Wandsworth via two pick-up points. I only joined the run at the 11th Hour so I hadn't bargained on running through an area as busy as Portobello Market on a sunny Saturday morning! We then went through Notting Hill, alongside Hyde Park, down past Gloucester Road, and then along the Kings Road and over Wandsworth Bridge. We finished at The Ship pub by the river.

NC: Tell me about Portobello – that must have been, how to put it, an experience.
BS: It really was! In fact, I'd say that was the highlight. The place was packed but the crowds split like the Red Sea when they saw us coming. People were cheering and whistling, everyone had their cameras and phones out. The disturbing thing was that getting eye-contact was a real issue – let's say the focal point for most people was just below the waist.

NC: I hear the Kings Road got a bit animated...
BS: Yup. It was FA Cup Final day and so Chelsea fans were out in their droves. We must have past about three open-top buses and we were covered in beer and, oddly enough, celery. I think it's one of the Chelsea traditions to throw celery around before games. We might have annoyed them because we were singing Portsmouth songs and wearing next to no clothes though.

NC: Did you pass any famous people on the way?
BS: Well, funnily enough, George Osborne lives in the same street as one of the organisers, where we started the run. He was on his way out with his wife and saw a load of strapping men in fluorescent ball-crushers doing stretches on his doorstep and so came over and asked "Just what's going on here then?" in a half-jesting half-concerned manner. It was the weekend after the new coalition government formed and so the press had been sniffing around for days. If only we'd arranged the run for a week earlier – we might have got some unexpected TV coverage!

NC: What can you take from the experience?
BS: I have to say I was slightly anxious before the start. I mean, I run a lot so the six miles wasn't an issue – it's just I usually run while fully dressed. But you know what, there wasn't time to get embarrassed because you pass people so quickly. Being in a bunch helped too - plus it was for a good cause, so it felt extra special, as if we were exempt from the usual rules of acceptability. We put smiles on so many people's faces – especially all those tourists doing bus tours. We must be on so many people's holiday snaps. All in all, it was an exhilarating hour. I think exhibitionism is the new me. I'm even considering the London Naked Bike Ride next month!

NC: So you would do it again then?
BS: We definitely want to make it into an annual event – maybe even bi-annual. We're already thinking of other potential routes. Maybe we can start in the West End, cut through Soho, filter down Oxford Street and cross Hyde Park. Although gracing Old Compton Street may give out the wrong signals. I'd definitely consider running a marathon in Budgy Smugglers. They were really comfortable - and no chaffing whatsoever.

NC: How did they react at The Ship when you arrived?
BS: It was hilarious. One of the guys is in the army and we were standing on the chairs and tables on the terrace as he led us through some comic military stretching routine when the landlord came out. He was clearly very disgruntled and could have chucked us out for all manner of things. But oddly enough, he simply stipulated that the pub decking had a "strict no-open shirt policy". He was going to ask us to leave but was appeased when we put in a huge order for beer and burgers.

So there you have it. For the confused people that witnessed the whole barmy escapade: an explanation to just why it happened; for others: another little anecdote covering the unpredictable nature of London and its inhabitants. For pictures, videos and more information about Budgy Smuggler and this crazy run you can visit the official Facebook page.

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